Hey hey! What up, Flavor Flav? Note my new PaRappa the Rapper chains, decisive proof that U CAN'T TOUCH ME!

Oh, who am I kidding? Confidence is at an all time low. Earlier this week I was in the Software Store and I saw this dreamy woman score a copy of Freedom Force, even though it had supposedly been sold out. To say I fell in love was an understatement. I'd found an angel in tight pants. She wasn't only beautiful -- she was a gamer! How was I supposed to win over the heart of a girl like that?

For inspiration, I turned to my idol, PaRappa the Rapper for the PlayStation. I realized that all I needed was mad rhythm! And, maybe these PaRappa the Rapper chains. What do you think? Do they make me look cool? I was thinking of showing up under her window tonight and "busting" some phat groovies. Like this:

My tight pants honey!
You're so money!
  You get my Metal Gear Solid
  You get my Deus so Ex-rated
I loves you a ton-ny!

I'm passion's creator
I'm a love...
...Liberator!

So what do you think? C'mon guys, really. When you're done pointing at me and laughing, let me know. It's the chains, isn't it? I GOTTA BELIEVE!