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10/31/2000
I CANNOT MASTER THE TORSO TWIST
You want to talk about bad game design? I got two words for you: Torso Frickin' Twist.
That's right, I'm talking about those pinheads who made MechWarrior, MechWarrior II, and all the other MechWarrior games that have big giant robots in them.
See, they got this thing where you're supposed to twist at the waist so you can walk in one direction and shoot in another. No giant robots would do this in the real world. That's balls out stupidity. What if you walked into a building while you were busy being torso twust? You would! Because it's dumb.
Last time I played MechWarrior I couldn't even get out of the training mission. That's because the TORSO NAZIS insisted that I bent at the waist to complete the mission. Listen, you little pimple-geeks, I can't twist at the waist in real life, so no way in hell I'm gonna force no robot to do it.
Come here, little twisting torso man. I will slam you.
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