Visit GameSpy.com!

View The Latest Victim
Hall of Previous Victims
Most Popular Victims EVER
Who Makes Up This Stuff?
How Does The Daily Victim Work?
Send Us Your Daily Victim Ideas!

The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted; The most beloved victims will return in a full-color feature and ongoing story each week.
 
A FAREWELL MESSAGE FROM FARGO

The Daily Victim will no longer be updated. A big thank you to all of my readers throughout the years! Please enjoy the archives, and be sure to Read a Personal Farewell Message from Fargo!

More Victims
<-[Previous] [Next]->

12/6/2000
MY LOSS OF SELF-ESTEEM CAN BE TRACED BACK TO THE LOSS OF THE TFC SUPER CONCUSSION GRENADE JUMP


There are some blows you just can't expect anyone to recover from. Like being tortured in Nam, losing a wife and kid in childbirth .... or that one Half-Life "upgrade" that wrecked the TeamFortress super-conc jump. My life went steadily downhill from there.

Back in the day? I was on top. I mean that literally -- me and the skybox would lock lips in loving embrace whenever I wanted. I had the timing down perfect -- I could super concussion jump at will. No wall was high enough to stop me. No sniper perch was safe. I was sailing like Earth Wind and Fire. I would look down and see the rolling terrain far below me, the little bridges, tiny pipebombs, and helpless miniscule enemy medics rushing impotently about the shrinking explosion of my spent concussion grenade ... I was God above.

One day it all came crashing onto my head, just as I used to crash onto the heads of unsuspecting snipers. They took away my super conc-jump. Soon I could never get the flag. Many times I couldn't find the front door of a base, having never used it before.

Shortly thereafter I lost my girlfriend. "I ... I can't get up," I tried to tell her. It's funny how you take things for granted.

Now I'm as landlocked as Switzerland. The enemy base seems so tall from down here. I am a prisoner of gravity. I am a worm. I am dirt.

 

[Victim idea submitted by GameSpy reader: Luis "PowerPigg" Marquez]

 

Rank this Victim!
Not Funny Keeper

[At the end of the week, highest ranked victims
will live on in the ongoing weekly features...]

More Victims:

   

Just What is the Daily Victim?

The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populate Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted. The most beloved victims will return in our full-color feature and continuing story each week.
GameSpy Comics