Visit GameSpy.com!

View The Latest Victim
Hall of Previous Victims
Most Popular Victims EVER
Who Makes Up This Stuff?
How Does The Daily Victim Work?
Send Us Your Daily Victim Ideas!

The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted; The most beloved victims will return in a full-color feature and ongoing story each week.
 
A FAREWELL MESSAGE FROM FARGO

The Daily Victim will no longer be updated. A big thank you to all of my readers throughout the years! Please enjoy the archives, and be sure to Read a Personal Farewell Message from Fargo!

More Victims
<-[Previous] [Next]->

10/25/2002
C’MON, LET’S LAY OFF THE SOCCERING AND START WITH THE RIOTING!


Wow, that was a nice kick, man. Had I been paying any attention to what I was doing with my goalie, I woulda moved up to block it. As it is, I’m still trying to figure out if the “X” button passes or shoots. Dammit, this pansy game isn’t what I think of when I think of Football! Er, sorry, “Soccer.”

No sir, first of all, back where I come from, a good game of football starts with a trip to the pub. And none of that watered-down toilet water, either ... we drink stuff that’ll curl your nuts. And then we chunk down chips with malt vinegar. Only once we’re sicky and barfy does someone suggest we kick the ball around, and we do it out in a parking lot surrounded by broken glass and barbed wire fences. In the morning half of us are dead and the other half can’t remember a damn thing.

Okay, so how do I throw the ball in again? The “X” button? Okay, you know what? Bollocks to this. I’m gonna go tip over a cop car.



 

Rank this Victim!
Not Funny Keeper

[At the end of the week, highest ranked victims
will live on in the ongoing weekly features...]

More Victims:

   

Just What is the Daily Victim?

The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populate Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted. The most beloved victims will return in our full-color feature and continuing story each week.
GameSpy Comics