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BIG CHANGES IN THE WORKS
Thanks again to everyone who submitted your work as part of the Daily Victim Artist Search! A redesign is underway and cool things are happening. Thanks for your patience...
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5/28/2002
OKAY, YOU RUN FORWARD, I'LL PUNCH THE GOALIE
Okay, here's the new deal: One of you run forward, I'll punch the goalie. Whoever has the ball should shoot. Okay, get ready. I'm going to punch the goalie now. Are you ready? KAPOW!
Dude you didn't SHOOT. You have to shoot the ball. The "A" button, not the "B" button. Hang on, as soon as we get the ball again, I'll punch the goalie. Ready? WHAMS! I decked him! What are you doing? You passed the ball to Bill again. The whole point of Sega Soccer Slam is not to pass the ball like a bunch of namby-pamby short-bus pissant mammaboy limp-wangs, the object is to strut around in masks and tights and wreck some chumps.
So here, I've got the ball, I'm gonna chuck it your way and then I'm gonna hit the goalie. You ready? Here. BAMS! You like that? What the hell, you didn't take the shot. Let's stop trying to play as a team here, guys. This is a goalie-punching game, got-dammit, I'm not walking off this field 'til we have some points on the board and some cleats in some guy's face. Run forward, I'll punch the goalie. Okay, fine. I'll punch YOU.
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The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populate Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted. The most beloved victims will return in our full-color feature and continuing story each week.
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