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The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted; The most beloved victims will return in a full-color feature and ongoing story each week.
 
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2/17/2001
MY INGENIOUS PLAN TO WIN THE INSTAGIB MATCH BY RE-ROUTING THE AIR CONDITIONERS HAS BACKFIRED


Well, as you no-doubt heard from this afternoon's fiasco, Crenshaw had to go to the hospital 'cuz I accidentally fired a pencil through his hand with my careful manipulation of the office air conditioning system.

On the upside, I won the daily InstaGib game. On the downside, I thought that law enforcement might get involved, so to cover my tracks I crawled back up into the air vents to remove any trace of my ingenious hamster-tubing.

Unfortunately, I seem to have wedged myself in a narrow duct here, and I can't seem to back out. I'm not claustrophobic, but, the air conditioner is still running and I'm FREEZING in here!

I don't see any way out of this one -- someone's going to have to come in and rescue me. I might as well holler for help.

"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLPPPP!!!"

For crying out loud, why doesn't someone answer? My voice has got to be carrying all over the building -- I can hear it reverberating through the ducts.

"HAAAAALLLLLPPPP!!" Is anyone there? Where the hell are the night shift tech support guys?

"HEEEEEAAAALLLPPP!!!"

 

AFTER YEARS OF BLISSFUL SILENCE THE CREEPY VOICES IN MY HEAD HAVE RETURNED
I can hear them echoing around the walls despite the pills I've been taking maybe I should cut back on the coffee I've had three or four pots this evening but then again that's no more than normal I think maybe some Cola will help me ignore them or perhaps some more banging on the walls GO AWAY VOICES! Stop making me do things I will paint my windows black and hum until the noises stop.

 

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