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The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted; The most beloved victims will return in a full-color feature and ongoing story each week.
 
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12/31/2002
I’VE BEEN PLAYING THE ARMY COMPUTER GAME FOR MONTHS. WHERE’S MY MONEY FOR COLLEGE?


That’s right, I “enlisted” the moment the game came out. I completed that training course in record time. And ‘cuz I’m a PATRIOT, I’ve been playing it every night. I’ve done my part for the secure future of the United States of America!

So where’s my college money, bitches? I heard about the Montgomery G.I. bill. And Uncle Monty says I got 50 g’s coming toward my college education. That’s right, cheerleaders and beer. PlayStation 2 until dawn with a couple of co-eds on my lap. Werd to many thousands of mothers far and wide.

I served my country ... now fork over the benjamins!


[Daily Victim idea submitted by GameSpy reader Blaine Tog. I’m not making his name up.]

 

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The Daily Victim is GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populate Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim is posted. The most beloved victims will return in our full-color feature and continuing story each week.
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