Hell no! Nerds won't go! We won't let you close Wizards of the Coast!

You heard me, Hasbro! When I caught word that you were closing all of the Wizards of the Coast stores, me and all my D&D-loving, dice-rolling, card-collecting, board-gaming buddies took up arms and stormed the mall.

Here we are, and we aren't leaving!

You can't take away our WotC stores. Where else am I going to find wicked cool boardgames like Attack? Or D&D modules that I always buy but never get around playing, so I just flip through them and think of really cool scenarios? What about those? How about those cool six-sided dice with the skulls for the "1" pip? WHO WILL PROVIDE THIS ESSENTIAL SERVICE?

Well, we're not gonna take it. We're nerds, and we're gonna be heard! We're geeky, and we're gonna be sneaky! We're dorks, and we're gonna ... [Hey guys, help me out here. Dorks? Sporks? Forks? Throw me a bone...]

Okay, no matter. Here's the plan. Me and all my buds are gonna camp out at this Wizards store from dawn 'til closing, EVERY DAY. And we're gonna line up at these tables here, and we're gonna be ANGRY! And we're gonna play Magic or Pokemon or Lord of the Rings collectable card games, and we're gonna shout incomprehensible things about Desolation Angels or beta Black Lotus cards. Also, we're not going to shower.

I guess it's not really that different than it is now.

Except we're ANGRY.

Victim Pic Small

*sniffles* Where else will I find a shelf full of discontinued Avalon Hill games? WHERE? TELL ME!

Score: 7.5; Total Votes: 2647 as of 2009-12-09.

Allright, gather 'round. I've developed a Call of Duty team strategy that speaks to all of our strengths.

I'd like to respectfully suggest that last week's Victim cram it in an uncomfortable place.

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