I’ve been playing the Army computer game for months. Where’s my money for college?

That’s right, I “enlisted” the moment the game came out. I completed that training course in record time. And ‘cuz I’m a PATRIOT, I’ve been playing it every night. I’ve done my part for the secure future of the United States of America!

So where’s my college money, bitches? I heard about the Montgomery G.I. bill. And Uncle Monty says I got 50 g’s coming toward my college education. That’s right, cheerleaders and beer. PlayStation 2 until dawn with a couple of co-eds on my lap. Werd to many thousands of mothers far and wide.

I served my country ... now fork over the benjamins!

[Daily Victim idea submitted by GameSpy reader Blaine Tog. I’m not making his name up.]

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Maybe I need to play through all the upcoming expansions. Okay, I'll do it. But only 'cuz I love the U.S.A.

Score: 7.05; Total Votes: 1784 as of 2009-12-09.

The Daily Victim Christmas Special 2002

MY New Year’s Resolution revolves around the cheese-grating-like decimation of you, and all your stupid Elves!

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