This new PC game is just a blank CD with instructions on the label for how to get the patch.

I find it particularly troubling that the cover of the CD is a photocopy of a handwritten label. Like I said, it’s completely blank, but the developer released a “patch” the same day it hit shelves.

I downloaded all 450MB of the patch and unzipped it into a folder, then clicked on the only available icon: “non_playable_alpha.exe.” First it asked me for my CD key. Then, it launched the auto-updater.

I suspected that they may have shipped the product a little early.

So I called up the publisher and chatted with their customer support line. They sent over two big burly men who gave me a swirly.

I can’t say I’m too pleased with my purchase, but according to the message boards the upcoming 0.04 patch will offer menus. I can’t wait!

Victim Pic Small

Pretty soon it'll almost live up to its full-page magazine ad!

Score: 8.12; Total Votes: 2592 as of 2009-12-09.

I’ve devised the perfect controller with which to play first-person shooters on a console

Attention people of the Morrowind Expansion Pack: Do you, too, wish to bring it?

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