I worry about the influence of Grand Theft Auto, but not because of the language or violence
No, I worry because my little brother is outside with his friends and they’re taking turns “jacking” his little red wagon. Look at them out there. It looks like a cross between the TV show Cops, school recess, and an episode of “Jackass.”
This is what I get for letting him play an “M” rated game. What are we teaching the youth of Ameri-- oh, wait. Now they’re playing a different game. It looks like my brother’s got the firehose, he’s inviting his friend to sit in the back -- awwww! Isn’t that sweet? They’re going to play “Fireman,” which you can also do in Grand Theft Auto. Well, I take back what I said, that’s some good wholesome fun.
Hang on ... hold up ... they’re not playing Fireman with that hose. He’s ... practicing his drive-by technique? Well, I’d put a stop to it, except he’s got a hose and I’m wearing a new wool sweater.
Now, where did his little friend Timmy go? Oh, there he is, by the garage. HE’S GOT A CHAINSAW! ... and since when did Timmy learn to speak Cuban? Well, I’d better put a stop to this. Do me a favor and distract my brother while I make a run for the garage. Oh, and if he pulls up next to you in the wagon and says, “Hop in, baby!” ... don’t get in.
Why don't you guys play Doctor? Pretend the red wagon is an ambulance. No ... no, don't JACK the Ambulance. Oh nevermind.
Score: 7.76; Total Votes: 2597 as of 2009-12-09.