Friend, Consider These Money-saving Tips

  • Memory cards cost mucho buck-ets. Simply pause your game and leave it on. Forever, if neccessary.

  • Used games are a ripoff. They give you $5 to turn one in, yet charge up to $30 when you buy those exact same games from them. Instead, simply stand outside and offer customers $10 for their used games. Everybody wins! You will need a variety of different hats, wigs, and fake mustaches to do this in front of the same store for more than a couple hours.

  • Get as many girlfriends as possible shortly before your birthday. Dump them before theirs.

  • New controllers cost money. Break yourself of the habit of biting them between rounds of Tony Hawk.

  • Consider charging your no-good friend Stu a quarter everytime he plays a round of Tekken.

  • Overcome your costly "food" addiction.

Victim Pic Small

Plus, Fargo paid me $5 bucks to write this week's victim for him. Score!

Score: 7.62; Total Votes: 1410 as of 2009-12-09.

Games That Have Only Limited Supplies of Ammo, but Let Me Quicksave, Might as Well Just Give Me Unlimited Ammo.

I Simply Refuse to Play Any Game That Cannot Correctly Calculate the Muzzle Velocity of a German Panzer IV's 75MM Main Gun.

Back To Index