Go ahead, move your little girlie pawn. I have a calculator-like mind and abs of steel. Watch now as I move my little pope-dude over to ... HERE! Look at that! Check, bitch!

That's right, I will kick your scrawny chess ass!

Oh, castling, hunh? That's the last refuge of the weak. Now I will uh -- move this -- SILENCE WEAK LITTLE MAN! And get these stupid chatters off of my channel, all the little voices crawling across the screen give me vertigo. Must CONCENTRATE. There -- oh yes -- oh look at this!! LOOK!

Bigity-BAM!

Now what are you going to do with your tiny white army, little chesswimp? I just moved in my -- the little horsey! He is gonna smack your shit up, flabbyman! You are headed for a full-on CHESSECTOMY!! I am going to put a big firm chess-boot high up into your scrawny chess ass!