Home Daily Victim Connections Daily Victim Reunion Project On Github
version 1
The Daily Victim

    Just What was the Daily Victim?

    The Daily Victim was GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populated Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim was posted. The most beloved victims returned in their full-color feature and continued story each week.

    About The Daily Victim

    Date Title Authors
    2002-03-01 How Does it Work? Dave 'Fargo' Kosak and Lemuel 'HotSoup' Pew
    2000-10-02 How Does it Work? (Original) Dave 'Fargo' Kosak and Mike 'Gabriel' Krahulik
    2001-07-30 Top 10 Daily Victims Dave 'Fargo' Kosak
    2000-10-02 Who Makes This Thing? Dave 'Fargo' Kosak, Mike 'Gabriel' Krahulik, Lemuel 'HotSoup' Pew
    2002-03-01 The Artist and the Madman Gamespy Staff
    2009-02-06 Excerpt From Fargo Fond Farewell Dave 'Fargo' Kosak
    2001-02-01 Anatomy of A Daily Victim Dave 'Fargo' Kosak and Mike 'Gabriel' Krahulik

    Visualizations

    Title Description
    Daily Victim Connections A map of all the connections between the victims.
    Daily Victim Reunion A group photo of all Daily Victims.

    The Daily Victims

    Date Score Votes Links To This Title
    2006-02-08 0 0 0 I make my living by selling things on Ebay
    2006-02-06 0 0 0 People Don't Believe Me Because My Name Is Sarcasm
    2004-06-23 0 0 0 A Brief but Illustrated Update on the Daily Victim
    2004-05-05 0 0 0 The Daily Victim Redesign Is Cruising Smoothly ... like a Missile.
    2004-03-16 6.82 2,447 1 The Search for a New GameSpy Artist Remains Steeped in Controversy.
    2004-02-18 7.06 2,080 1 The Daily Victim artist search is wrapping up. Like the dismal closure of a lavish Broadway play.
    2004-02-04 7.38 2,228 2 The Search for a New Artist Rages On
    2004-01-23 7.62 3,557 0 Thanks to that recent server crash, our online wedding never happened. Now get out of my house!
    2004-01-21 9.62 6,745 1 My plan to crash my favorite MMORPG server required a little help from an unexpected place
    2004-01-09 8.07 3,226 1 Attention fellow roleplayers! The End is Nigh! And by Nigh, I mean Really, Really Close!
    2004-01-07 9.17 2,741 4 Well, there IS a way to get your dead character's lost items back, but ... well, it ain't pretty.
    2004-01-06 9.09 2,155 0 No Haden, you're not allowed to play Mario Kart: Double Dash!! around the children. No, not because of the game, because of you.
    2004-01-05 7.91 1,498 0 I'd like to respectfully suggest that last week's Victim cram it in an uncomfortable place.
    2003-12-30 7.5 2,647 1 Hell no! Nerds won't go! We won't let you close Wizards of the Coast!
    2003-12-17 8.32 3,303 0 Allright, gather 'round. I've developed a Call of Duty team strategy that speaks to all of our strengths.
    2003-12-16 8.56 2,075 0 The German Bunnyhopper is tearing our lines to shreds! We'll have to send in ... Sergei.
    2003-12-15 8.6 2,196 1 Stalingrad is a grey wasteland of rubble and human remains. Only One man can get across the railyard alive...
    2003-12-11 9.09 3,236 0 My Imaginary eBay Girlfriend Doesn't Understand My Gaming Hobby
    2003-12-09 7.03 1,897 0 I don't care what they say. Growing hairy feet is the hottest new geek trend.
    2003-12-03 6.35 2,455 0 Happy Holidays, Skip. Here's your present. It's a gift certificate for ... A MANBEATING!
    2003-12-02 9.2 2,409 0 Victory will be mine in this Battlefield 1942 map contest ... though I had to take some drastic actions.
    2003-11-27 8.32 2,362 0 What, me? Carve the turkey? Well, I guess I got the skillz...
    2003-11-26 8.75 2,155 1 What would YOU give ... for the one, perfect lap?
    2003-11-20 9.04 3,402 0 Wow, Project Gotham Guy has answers for everything.
    2003-11-19 7.7 1,787 0 Honey, I've got a great idea for what to get little Kip for an E-rated Christmas!
    2003-11-17 8.35 2,346 0 My husband's online roleplaying habits are a serious source of marital strife.
    2003-11-11 8 3,024 0 Check it out — look what I can see from this new satellite imaging website!
    2003-11-10 9.22 2,689 0 I warned him! I told him not to play with the EyeToy for an hour after eating, but he didn't listen! He didn't listen!
    2003-11-05 8.26 2,727 0 Now that there's a child in the house, I'm only permitted to play Disney's Extreme Skate Adventure
    2003-11-03 7.51 2,127 0 Nope, can't play Call of Duty. Doctor's Orders. You'll have to do it for me.
    2003-10-31 9.23 3,736 1 A Special Halloween Victim of Unmitigated Horror
    2003-10-29 5.01 2,762 0 One word, dude: Halo.
    2003-10-27 7.61 1,979 0 So, you just jumped out of a burning building into a hail of machine gun fire? CHILD'S PLAY!
    2003-10-24 7.8 3,315 0 So uh guys ... about that whole ... "ring" thing...
    2003-10-21 8.24 2,287 0 Mr. Pembleton's last will and testament clearly establishes this trust fund for his favorite MMOG character.
    2003-10-20 8.48 1,903 0 Gentlemen, if you please. Remove your network cables for a moment of Internet silence in honor of our dear friend Dave.
    2003-10-16 7.86 2,251 0 My Contra-Honed Reflexes can defeat your piddly game in mere hours!
    2003-10-15 7.8 1,744 0 Sure it's legit. It's what I call the Star Wars Galaxies MBA program.
    2003-10-13 8.13 2,584 0 I'll go on the record and say that I don't think what you downloaded here is actually the Half-Life 2 source code.
    2003-10-09 8.35 2,230 0 I will be brutally honest. There's no way you look like your Tiger Woods 2004 character.
    2003-10-07 8.58 2,370 1 I can't possibly clean up my hard drive. I'm too emotionally invested.
    2003-10-06 8.08 2,134 0 What kind of roleplaying game is it? Does it have towns? After playing hundreds of RPGs in my lifetime, I've developed a fear of towns.
    2003-10-03 7.66 2,043 0 Well Jer, no, putting that new Radeon card down your pants isn't what I'd consider a "Casemod" in the classical sense
    2003-10-02 8.69 2,283 0 If you yell "Sniper" into my ear ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to rip your lips off.
    2003-10-01 6.75 1,424 0 Three words, my friend, three words: Massively Multiplayer Curling.
    2003-09-29 7.69 2,211 0 For God's sake! Pick up the blue dot! A man's life is at stake!
    2003-09-26 7.55 2,344 0 You tell the captain of this plane that my GameBoy is almost out of batteries! Now MUSH!
    2003-09-23 7.71 1,777 0 Why can't you people just take the hint and get as addicted to Tiger Woods as I am?
    2003-09-22 8.07 2,059 0 I lost my job at the Hospital just for trying to get the high score on the EKG
    2003-09-19 8.81 1,735 0 There's a crippling loss of personal dignity associated with this year's 'Talk Like a Pirate Day.'
    2003-09-17 8.36 1,772 0 Physics, man. It's never too early to prepare for the Physics.
    2003-09-16 9.11 2,038 0 What hideous depraved intelligence is concocting such a grotesque perversion of Starcraft strategy, and why is it working?
    2003-09-12 8.49 2,542 0 My 6-month plan to get my hot girlfriend into Cosplay has colossally backfired.
    2003-09-11 7.27 1,792 0 Ubisoft's new logo is driving icicles of pure thought directly into my unwilling BRAIN.
    2003-09-10 8.45 2,442 0 j4bb3rw0xx0r Presents: The Diablo II Drinking Game!
    2003-09-09 9.2 2,524 0 Bad Things happened when I inadvertently released my own game patch.
    2003-09-08 7.64 1,695 0 My new mod for War III is a conversion to a mod I made for Starcraft that emulated my WarCraft II mod that emulated C&C!
    2003-09-05 5.8 1,648 0 Maybe I should switch to the Du-Rag. A man's got to put a lot of thought into these things.
    2003-09-04 8.19 2,093 0 What, you want to talk to that girl? No way man, you don't stand a chance. She cons yellow to you. Maybe red.
    2003-09-03 8.28 1,921 0 What, no Alienware PC for my birthday!? It's not like I asked for guns! Or drugs!
    2003-09-02 7.84 1,321 0 I'd love to help you fend of the Empire's invasion, but it's past my bedtime.
    2003-08-29 7.73 1,793 0 Avast, ye sea doggies! Hand yer captain a manual or something!
    2003-08-28 7.92 1,784 0 I clubbed a sales clerk unconscious and I'll do the same to you!
    2003-08-27 8.47 1,729 0 To my friends, family, and loved ones: I would like to apologize in advance for the weekend of debauchery I'm planning on Tatooine.
    2003-08-26 8.83 1,750 0 Battlefield 1942 Scientific Journal for August 26th, 2003
    2003-08-21 7.43 2,033 0 You're paying for my fansite to come out and preview your new game? Me and my 20 friends are SO there!
    2003-08-20 8.05 2,459 0 My new phone service has unlimited instant text messaging! It will usher in a new era of open communication!
    2003-08-18 9.01 2,322 0 So, you'd like to camp planes with us in Battlefield 1942? You'll have to fill out some of this paperwork.
    2003-08-15 8.74 2,818 0 I TOLD you you didn't need that many monitors. NOW look at what happened.
    2003-08-14 7.3 1,490 0 My Madden 2004 Strategy is a combination of grit, strategic thinking, and end-zone interceptions leading to 99-yard touchdowns.
    2003-08-12 8.89 2,689 0 EGAH! It's the most feared Sith Lord of any of the Star Wars Galaxies servers!
    2003-08-07 7.43 2,782 0 Less talking, more light-sabering!
    2003-08-06 7.09 1,581 0 I'm sorry to hear that you and your girlfriend broke up. She seemed perfect for you. You know. From what I could gather on IRC.
    2003-08-05 7.21 1,678 0 If a foodstuff can't be prepared in between rounds of Medal of Honor, I'm not interested!
    2003-08-04 8.68 1,574 0 You've never looked fear in the eye? Let me tell you about my experience with Link Dead, ace online pilot.
    2003-07-17 6.86 3,067 0 AUGH! HotSoup's computer crashed before he finished drawing my legs!
    2003-07-15 7.85 2,812 1 Knights of the Old Republic is so great it will crush you physically and emotionally!
    2003-07-12 7.93 1,781 0 No! Stop twinking my Dwarf! He's a tax writeoff!
    2003-07-11 8.02 1,855 0 I'll tell you when I've had enuff, just fork over the ale, Neverwinter wench!
    2003-07-10 7.63 2,778 0 Oh yah? That's nothing. I play Quake 3 in 16384x12288 resolution.
    2003-07-09 5.95 2,056 0 Keep the ... get them ... oh ... put the mouse droids away please!
    2003-07-08 8.12 1,913 0 I just can't stop killin' Rebel scum!
    2003-07-06 8.02 1,983 0 Oh no sir! You can't bring that inside this cantina!
    2003-07-03 8.75 2,288 0 Kids: Game Boy and Jury Duty DON'T MIX.
    2003-07-02 7.15 1,842 0 Honey, what do you want from me? The Imperial March is in my head. I have to play Galaxies!
    2003-07-01 7.82 1,542 1 No man, it's all cool. I'm just going to write off my EverQuest Dwarf as a tax loss.
    2003-06-26 7.23 2,352 0 I didn't want the bank I work for to know I'd applied to a job at a gaming company, so I wrote all my emails in 'l33t.'
    2003-06-25 8.35 1,910 0 Shhh, keep your voices down. That guy's been playing a single game of 'snake' on his cell phone for a week straight.
    2003-06-20 8.84 3,357 0 I managed to install Civilization onto the school's library Computers, but at what cost?
    2003-06-19 8.38 1,808 0 WarioWare can easily bring about marital difficulties.
    2003-06-18 8.72 1,644 0 My original plan was to set this wedding reception alight by overclocking the Electric Slide...
    2003-06-17 8.21 1,634 0 With rain clouds coming, I had to pull a Project Gotham with the riding lawnmower.
    2003-06-11 8.25 2,681 0 This Star Wars Galaxies beta NDA is going to tear our friendship apart.
    2003-06-10 7.56 1,906 1 My interview at the movie theater went downhill fast when they started talking strategy.
    2003-06-07 9.14 3,429 0 This invasion is unlike any invasion I've ever slacked onto before.
    2003-06-06 8.18 1,445 0 What is this? You guys call THIS a game trailer? Step aside and let me show you how to edit.
    2003-06-05 8.14 1,725 0 Listen up, people! As Ultima Online Griefers, a new golden age is now upon us.
    2003-06-04 8.73 1,814 1 Guys, guys — the problem here, as I see it, is that our entire team is a bunch of Support Slackers.
    2003-06-03 8.09 1,963 0 The physics from my recent auto accident weren't at all realistic.
    2003-05-30 8.54 2,852 2 In PlanetSide, I've perfected a new type of class. "Support Slacker."
    2003-05-28 8.1 2,646 0 We've got a lock on "The One." He's running through the post office level banging on the "x" button repeatedly.
    2003-05-23 7.23 1,949 0 Many readers simply don't understand what qualifies a game for the "Tingle Awards."
    2003-05-18 7.51 2,070 0 Wow, Your Online Console Game Looks Great. But It's Lacking a Few "emergency" Features...
    2003-05-15 8.62 2,450 0 I am a fully trained Pr355 N1nj4. I alone have the sixth freedom.
    2003-05-13 9.16 2,357 0 Security at E3 was tight. But not as tight as a finely crafted, masterfully executed backup plan.
    2003-05-11 8.06 1,726 4 You guys, I’m serious. This big E3 tradeshow is our best and only chance to buy Vivendi!
    2003-05-05 8.01 2,968 0 Aw man. Just look at you, dude. I knew I shouldn’t have given you that old copy of Harvest Moon.
    2003-05-01 9.01 3,711 1 I lost my job at the grocery store today for cranking up the difficulty on the checkout belt.
    2003-04-29 8.54 2,217 0 I love editing my own videogame baseball team. Instead of nine well-balanced players, my team consists of five mutants.
    2003-04-27 8.64 1,858 0 Dance Dance Story: A tale of love and phat beetz ends.
    2003-04-26 8.49 1,211 1 Pssst, ladies. I understand you have a love problem with those boys from the arcade. Might I offer advice?
    2003-04-25 8.75 1,524 1 Dude, I know that you love this girl, but what you’re talking about isn’t merely winning an arcade game — it’s suicide!
    2003-04-24 8.07 1,574 3 They say that love springs eternal; but can it freestyle into a Caution Drop on DDR Extreme?
    2003-04-23 7.82 1,357 4 Lesser men have been able to bring down the house; but when you bring down the hizzouse, it requires special pants.
    2003-04-21 7.44 1,671 5 Dance Dance Story Part I: An Important Message from the Minstrel of Ph4t B33tz
    2003-04-20 8.69 1,758 1 What follows is a true account of the greatest Tingle that ever lived
    2003-04-18 8.25 1,617 1 In order to find a Tingle, you need to start THINKING like a Tingle.
    2003-04-17 8.42 1,764 2 No, sir. The Tingle is armed, and almost definitely dangerous. I think he's got a bomb.
    2003-04-16 7.8 1,581 3 What did you do to Steve? I saw him taking off in his Tingle outfit, weeping and carrying a grappling hook and a weed eater.
    2003-04-15 7.5 1,904 5 Bad Tingle? No bad Tingle! Tingle is good! Tingle is a GOOD Tingle!
    2003-04-14 7.94 2,001 4 Okay, I’m going to say it one last time. Hand over the Game Boy. Your Tingle privileges are revoked.
    2003-04-07 7.6 2,876 1 Believe tha messageboardz: My PlanetSide faction wi11 CRUSH J00!
    2003-04-04 8.13 1,949 0 The ruins of our Animal Crossing town are best cleared by an elite group of heavily-armed special ops units.
    2003-04-03 8.39 1,937 1 My recent homecoming to Animal Crossing was not the joyous reunion I expected.
    2003-04-01 8.08 2,265 0 Our PC game isn’t delayed; I prefer the term, “Extended Development.”
    2003-03-31 8.3 2,272 0 Hello kind shopkeeper, I’m here to examine your pottery. And by ‘examine’ I mean ‘smash until gems come out.’
    2003-03-26 6.61 2,926 1 Thank you, Legend of Zelda! I finally have a vehicle to vent my rage against ... plants!
    2003-03-20 7.13 3,348 0 That’s a typo — my emoticon is not actually drooling.
    2003-03-16 8.25 2,677 0 Ladies, gentlemen, I believe the time has come for our EverQuest guild to fake its own death.
    2003-03-14 7.88 2,353 0 How many times I gotta tell you, Ned? There is no PK’ing in The Sims Online.
    2003-03-13 9.38 5,214 2 My love of survival horror games has perverted the delicate sensibilities of my parrot.
    2003-03-12 8.62 1,984 0 For the upcoming conflict in the gulf, we’ll be sending our foremost experts in grenade-jumping.
    2003-03-11 8.43 2,570 0 I’ve played so many World War II games that they’ve long since ceased to have any individual significance.
    2003-03-06 8.49 2,457 2 I take issue with yesterday’s assertion that my guild faked the EverQuest dragon-slaying.
    2003-03-05 7.54 2,155 2 I have what I believe to be conclusive evidence that the Archon’s Minions EverQuest guild FAKED the Dragon-Slayings.
    2003-03-04 7.45 2,083 0 I Have a Great Idea for a Daily Victim, Provided You Fill Out the Following Paperwork.
    2003-02-26 7.71 2,892 0 We’ve got to stop hiring people just because they’re good at LAN parties.
    2003-02-23 7.94 2,869 0 Hey you kids! Stop bazookaing your teammates into the water!
    2003-02-20 6.86 2,969 0 Guys, I figured out how to smuggle a PS2 and EQ Online Adventures into school.
    2003-02-16 8.77 3,647 1 EA Technical Support was not amused by your semi-pornographic SimCity town names.
    2003-02-14 7.36 2,831 0 Hey honey, didja ever smoke a chia-pet?
    2003-02-12 7.93 2,538 0 Wolfenstien’s few. The proud. The mangled Venom-wielders screaming for medics.
    2003-02-11 8.5 2,390 0 My cat should be a Metal Gear “Fox-Hound” Special Operative.
    2003-02-09 8.59 2,780 0 That’s it, I’m through. I’ve decided to stop dating gamers.
    2003-02-06 9.03 4,297 1 Yo, Frank, can you please stop using obscenities as city names in Sim City 4?
    2003-02-05 8.41 2,465 0 Moving to Tokyo in order to be the first to play Soul Calibur II has its downsides.
    2003-02-01 9.3 3,480 2 It was a Battlefield game that will live in infamy. If, by infamy, you mean easily forgotten weakness.
    2003-01-24 8.48 4,081 1 Who ever told you that trying to seduce a gamer was easy?
    2003-01-23 8.65 1,984 2 Those weird war-dudes have taken over our LAN gaming center
    2003-01-22 9.01 1,551 3 At long last I can finally live the dream and play Battlefield: 1942 for a living.
    2003-01-21 8.4 1,909 2 Just ‘cuz a guy plays as a chick in an RPG isn’t any reason to nullify his online wedding. Er, HER wedding.
    2003-01-20 8.12 1,973 1 Are you trying to tell me that these leather gauntlets did not actually belong to Clint Eastwood?
    2003-01-16 8.87 2,007 2 Don’t be mislead. The REAL money in organized crime comes from illicit online auctions of online RPG lewt.
    2003-01-15 9.19 2,099 3 It’s amazing the kind of lewt you can nab when someone fireballs an online RPG wedding party.
    2003-01-14 9.34 3,024 6 Online weddings, online schmeddings. Like I’m supposed to get all hopped up about the marriage of “Lady Gloria Perfectteeth.”
    2003-01-13 8.94 1,686 2 Those movies not withstanding, I really think us elves are getting misrepresented in the media.
    2003-01-12 8.68 1,958 1 I’m being hounded by some elf dude just ‘cuz I kicked his rear in Warcraft.
    2003-01-10 8.51 1,930 1 But sir, Battle.net’s policy about disconnects makes no exceptions if your house blows up. It’s in the EULA.
    2003-01-09 9.07 2,484 2 Anything less than third-degree burns is no reason to quit a perfectly good game of WarCraft III.
    2003-01-08 8.61 2,234 1 Just lie low and follow my lead, dude. We’ll get this PlayStation 2 mod-chipped. You just gotta know the right people.
    2003-01-07 8.8 2,482 1 An entire generation didn’t graduate from Clarion College in 1992 because I installed Civilization into the computer labs.
    2003-01-05 8.36 1,540 0 Move over! When King Hans plays Medieval: Total War, he demands that his steaks RARE. Still mooing, even.
    2003-01-03 6.96 1,573 0 I have an urgent decision to undertake with regards to Mario Party and the mattress outside
    2003-01-02 7.58 2,063 1 I’m just too nice for all of these ‘Open Ended’ RPGs.
    2003-01-01 8.51 1,992 3 MY New Year’s Resolution revolves around the cheese-grating-like decimation of you, and all your stupid Elves!
    2002-12-31 7.05 1,784 0 I’ve been playing the Army computer game for months. Where’s my money for college?
    2002-12-24 8.6 2,358 0 The Daily Victim Christmas Special 2002
    2002-12-20 8.72 2,765 1 What if a game were so good that anyone playing it dropped off the face of the Earth? How would you find out about it?
    2002-12-19 7.73 2,238 0 You’d best be showing us that ladder full of orcs falling into the army of orcs, and you’d best be showing the whole thing.
    2002-12-17 8.07 2,206 0 Okay, new plan. Our new MMORPG game will be coded entirely using the Macromedia Flash MX 30-day trial. So we have to work fast.
    2002-12-16 7.99 1,903 0 No man, the problem is, the guy at the Returns desk is an ex insurance claims investigator.
    2002-12-12 8.9 2,719 1 Don’t go in there! Hans’s game of Medieval: Total War has spun into a harrowing Caligula-like descent into debauchery!
    2002-12-11 8.42 1,984 0 For our fiscal year 2003 planning meeting, I’d like to suggest we employ a Medieval: Total War business strategy.
    2002-12-10 8.21 2,636 1 Okay man, listen up: I’ve developed a 32-step program designed to get my hot girlfriend into Cosplay.
    2002-12-08 7.93 2,429 0 My TiVo wants me dead.
    2002-12-06 7.91 2,338 0 I’m sorry Germany, but the Pope told me to take you down!
    2002-12-05 7.73 2,007 0 It is time for those of us wise in the ways of martial combat to stand against our unfair portrayal in the videogame media
    2002-12-04 7.87 2,111 0 Attention people of the Morrowind Expansion Pack: Do you, too, wish to bring it?
    2002-12-03 8.12 2,592 0 This new PC game is just a blank CD with instructions on the label for how to get the patch.
    2002-12-02 7.65 2,134 0 I’ve devised the perfect controller with which to play first-person shooters on a console
    2002-11-28 8.01 2,012 0 The Daily Victim Thanksgiving Special 2002
    2002-11-27 9.19 3,775 1 My TiVo thinks I’m Japanese.
    2002-11-26 7.61 2,183 2 To truly master Tekken 4, one must learn to bend like the autumn leaf. Like that’s ever gonna happen.
    2002-11-24 8.59 2,197 1 With my professional gaming career on the rocks, I opted to become a color commentator
    2002-11-21 7.17 2,620 0 I just got one of those new cell-phone PDA dealies. That’s the kind of thing you spend money on when you don’t have a girl.
    2002-11-18 6.66 2,270 0 Percy is in need of comforting after the second Harry Potter movie.
    2002-11-16 9.1 1,892 0 Playing games like EverQuest over a cell phone presents unique challenges.
    2002-11-14 8.57 2,711 1 As a professional gamer, my recent onset of motion sickness has qualified me for disability benefits.
    2002-11-13 7.14 2,536 0 What kind of crazy whack-job emoticons is this EverQuest chick sending me!?
    2002-11-12 8.29 2,072 2 Your poor performance with the aircraft carrier has prompted me to resume the practice of naval flogging
    2002-11-09 8.83 3,148 1 I am the King of Macros ... and I just met my Queen
    2002-11-07 8.38 2,621 1 Until today I had operated under the flawed assumption that I was the tech God
    2002-11-06 7.01 2,395 0 Whhooaaa - check it OUT! The guy across the street has a leaked DOOM III executable!
    2002-11-05 7.84 1,865 0 I’m voting on a straight “Video Game” platform.
    2002-11-04 7.88 2,189 1 Look here, I want Mario Sunshine for Christmas ... Or I’m gonna start livin’ the dream, baby!
    2002-11-03 8.92 2,385 0 When it comes to Team-Killing, I’m a conscientious objector.
    2002-11-01 7.76 2,597 0 I worry about the influence of Grand Theft Auto, but not because of the language or violence
    2002-10-31 7.47 2,221 0 Nobody wants to get it on with the Fat Undead Guy from Doom III.
    2002-10-30 8.55 2,160 0 I just had to pull a grand theft Grand Theft Auto
    2002-10-29 8.76 2,755 1 Oh yah — there’s not a single thing you can do or say in Counter-Strike that I haven’t bound to a single keystroke!
    2002-10-27 7.5 2,268 1 It’s not a good idea to use The Sims to make important family decisions.
    2002-10-25 6.97 2,019 0 C’mon, let’s lay off the Soccering and start with the rioting!
    2002-10-24 8.94 2,522 0 This whole ‘Relaxing Zen Garden’ thing is really wiggin’ me out.
    2002-10-23 7.43 1,906 0 MWA-HAAH! My skillful machinations have allowed me to absolutely corner the burgeoning Sims Online Lawn Gnome market!
    2002-10-22 8.99 2,286 1 Team killing is a disease, and I’m not the cure
    2002-10-21 8.57 2,136 1 There’s a lot of money to be made as an eBay Fictionalizationizer.
    2002-10-20 9.06 1,938 0 A true Internet entrepreneur can really profit from someone like ‘Tied-Up Guy.’
    2002-10-18 7.53 2,064 0 If only I had known space travel was so easy before I bought my Ferrari
    2002-10-17 8.38 2,549 0 Wow, that “Ghandi” dude is one ornery killing machine.
    2002-10-14 8.59 2,807 2 So I said, “Honey, before we jump right in and buy a kitten, maybe we should consult The Sims”
    2002-10-12 9.32 4,295 7 I’d never thought that the power of Twinking people in RPGs could be used for evil
    2002-10-11 6.25 1,824 0 Laugh all you want, this is the only way I can play Need for Speed without getting mad vertigo
    2002-10-10 7.16 1,845 0 This Sim needs some sort of Sock Puppet intervention
    2002-10-09 9.13 2,530 1 All right! ‘Tied-up’ dude is back online!
    2002-10-08 8.08 2,215 5 Hey guys? Guys? Could you stop playing Navy Seals a sec? I’ve got kinda a situation here.
    2002-10-07 7.43 2,311 0 Whhoooooaa, honey, we gotta buy this vacuum cleaner, it looks like something the Protoss would use.
    2002-10-06 9.24 2,296 1 You ever resuscitate a dead arcade machine? It can get pretty ugly.
    2002-10-04 9.35 5,934 1 Until now, Twinking people in online RPGs has been a reward in and of itself.
    2002-10-03 7.33 1,916 0 The problem with the WaveBird Wireless Controller is that you can chuck it. Far.
    2002-10-02 8.07 2,236 1 Ah! Would that I could play Battlefield: 1942 for a living.
    2002-10-01 8.14 1,961 0 So, you got a bootleg copy of the second Lord of the Rings movie? That’s nothing. I know a feller who has a book of the third one
    2002-09-30 7.75 2,079 0 I seemed to have joined an Unreal Tournament 2003 server filled with Dadaists.
    2002-09-28 9.19 2,668 3 My teammates won’t stop talking like pirates, but I’ve kinda warmed to the idea.
    2002-09-27 7.57 1,884 2 Man, how can you cheat in Animal Crossing? Doesn’t it make you feel dirty?
    2002-09-26 9.4 5,397 3 The loss of our Sinistar Arcade machine was a bitter, bitter blow.
    2002-09-25 8.39 1,675 0 Well, yes, I was hoping Dexter Events Consultants could help me plan for my next LAN party: “Operation St0nkd0wn.”
    2002-09-24 7.71 1,730 2 For some reason drawing a penis on my door in Animal Crossing seemed like a good idea at the time.
    2002-09-23 9.17 2,652 1 A hideous surreality hung over this Battlefield 1942 server ... like a cloud.
    2002-09-21 8.65 1,729 2 I'll never understand the fixation with my dad's unorthodox Battlfield 1942 tactics.
    2002-09-20 6.51 1,896 0 This morning when I turned on Animal Crossing, there was a severed horse head in my bed
    2002-09-19 8.73 2,427 3 ‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’ is making it really difficult to coordinate my Battlefield 1942 team.
    2002-09-18 8.2 2,036 2 Until I find out who chopped my coconut tree, the Animal Crossing hatchet executions will COMMENCE!
    2002-09-17 7.82 1,593 0 That new kitten is either howling from fear or mocking my Unreal Tournament skillz.
    2002-09-16 7.18 1,708 0 My Unreal Bombing Run tactics make great men weep and lesser men crumble.
    2002-09-15 9.35 4,791 2 Playing Battlefield 1942 with you is like playing Carmageddon.
    2002-09-13 8.67 2,564 0 Man, I would give anything for a hit of whatever dope the driver of this tank is smoking.
    2002-09-12 6.84 1,838 0 The world’s smallest violin and I wish to discuss the loss of your WarCraft III hero
    2002-09-11 5.39 1,651 0 When they needs the bananas, nine out of ten Yoshis come to me.
    2002-09-10 8.98 3,197 3 My Dad's a smart guy, but his plans for handling Battlefield 1942 snipers are somewhat unorthodox
    2002-09-08 8.71 2,042 0 Lemme tell you about the geek that got away...
    2002-09-07 9.32 2,861 1 Good Quality Assurance is hard to fake. Especially wearing this.
    2002-09-06 8.82 2,741 2 You want to play Battlefield again? What, you're missing a hood ornament?
    2002-09-05 5.94 2,435 0 I've put off that PC hardware upgrade for hours. It's time!
    2002-09-03 6.68 1,620 0 My 'Platforms Floating in Space' skills are honed to perfection, sir.
    2002-09-01 8.89 1,881 1 In my expert, mechanical opinion, the problem is that your tank is stuck in a tree.
    2002-08-30 7.28 1,507 0 You leave me no choice but to implement a 'Scorched Earth' Monkey Ball policy
    2002-08-28 7.94 2,118 2 I think the issue here is that the 'Horrifying Human Wave Attack' is simply not the best multiplayer strategy.
    2002-08-27 8.32 1,911 1 Our company will go to great lengths to ensure that we keep our QA department
    2002-08-26 6.54 1,774 0 Doom III's new lighting effects will harken a new 'Dark Age' of gameplay!
    2002-08-24 9.06 2,160 2 A Pr355 N1nj4 has no respect for the term 'Closed' Beta
    2002-08-23 8.3 2,561 0 My new cable modem has taught me universal truths that I didn't want to know.
    2002-08-22 8.54 2,331 1 Look dammit, this is your third and last tank, Herr Kommandant.
    2002-08-21 7.62 2,233 0 I'd like you to meet my friend Jared. He's in Doom III denial.
    2002-08-20 7 1,760 0 For months I agonized over where to get toner cartridges — and then, WHAMS! There was the answer, right in my email!
    2002-08-19 8.06 2,522 0 The top-of-the-line PC I ordered was obsolete before I finished entering my credit card number
    2002-08-18 8.72 1,820 0 Miscommunication is the cornerstone of any dysfunctional gamer relationship
    2002-08-16 6.35 2,049 0 And now it is time for the glorious peoples' reinstall!
    2002-08-15 8.93 1,651 1 The PR355 N1NJ4 returns! Operation: QuakeCon Doomiltration
    2002-08-14 6.8 1,863 0 Good base defense requires intimate awareness of one's surroundings and uncanny perception
    2002-08-13 8.44 1,885 0 Our LAN administrator has been rigging our Warcraft III games using remote desktops
    2002-08-12 7.37 2,403 0 I sent my resume and portfolio to the Unreal team, unaware of what was to follow.
    2002-08-10 8.51 1,906 0 Duke Nukem was probably a better strip poker player than me
    2002-08-09 8.9 2,567 1 Playing Day of Defeat while on the phone with your woman can really stress an otherwise healthy relationship
    2002-08-08 8.03 1,979 1 Hold the phone guys, I've another killer idea. Anyone ever heard of Vivendi-Universal?
    2002-08-07 7.67 1,258 0 Kids, there will be no "Super Guinea Pig Ball" in this house. Let me explain.
    2002-08-06 7.83 2,197 0 The most difficult part of sneaking online after dark is muffling the modem
    2002-08-05 8.29 2,436 0 McDonald's Play Palace gives me unlimited access to small, easily-beatable Super Smash Bros. opponents
    2002-08-03 8.76 1,616 0 Having created the smartest AI to ever grace a computer game, I found it now necessary to bust it out of 'The Joint.'
    2002-08-02 7.57 1,963 0 I spent three solid months of my life solving Tony Hawk 3 just to watch a bunch of munchwads play musical chairs!?
    2002-08-01 6.42 1,583 0 When I asked Craig to get us directions to KFC, I didn't expect him to use Crazi Taxi 3.
    2002-07-31 8.76 2,556 1 Everything I ever needed to know about Summer Camp I learned from Duke Nukem
    2002-07-30 8.16 1,724 0 The off-site administrative meeting means I'm in charge of the office. Bust out the Velcro!
    2002-07-29 7.49 2,029 0 The 200 pound mouse has done wonders for my upper body strength
    2002-07-27 9.13 6,214 1 I tried to dial the WarCraft III tips line, but then things got raunchy
    2002-07-26 8.12 1,883 0 Extra! Extra! Read all about it! U.S. President Declares War on Camping!
    2002-07-25 7.66 1,275 0 Tribute to the Violence Inherent in the System
    2002-07-24 8.8 1,636 2 C'mon, boys. It's time to bust us some roleplayin' freaks.
    2002-07-23 9.06 1,336 2 Today our Neverwinter world shall be unleashed to the sycophantic public. My AI is smarter than all of them.
    2002-07-22 8.06 1,247 2 Friends, I tell you the truth: Man can't live on Neverwinter alone
    2002-07-20 8.53 1,357 3 Our mind-blowing Neverwinter scenario will require days of focused coding in a remote mountain retreat
    2002-07-19 8.17 1,564 6 I have a plan for a Neverwinter scenario so incredible it'll melt the skin off of your body!
    2002-07-18 9.07 2,697 1 I've blown $240 this past month because the girl on the game tips hotline is hot
    2002-07-17 6.99 1,886 0 I feel for the peons
    2002-07-16 7.53 1,547 0 After being ordained over the Internet, I feel qualified to conduct an online wedding
    2002-07-15 7.9 2,812 0 Listen, mister! This here adventuring party doesn't stoop to "Chaotic" Evil, and we're not about to start.
    2002-07-13 8.58 1,799 0 We now return LIVE to the observation mode of Bl00dlu5t's Tribes II server where an amazing feat is soon to transpire
    2002-07-12 8.45 2,905 0 The Littlest Orc: A Bedtime Story
    2002-07-11 7.51 1,855 0 I can't bear to watch you mod that GameCube
    2002-07-10 7.52 1,654 0 I probably blew my Nintendo Street Team audition when I threatened to knee-drop Luigi in the balls
    2002-07-09 8.12 2,184 0 FWWwoooAAAHH! You can get a wicked buzz just by licking the Warcraft III box!
    2002-07-08 8.04 2,009 0 Hello, sir! Allow me to demonstrate for you a stunning new way to roleplay without a PC!
    2002-07-06 9.1 1,993 0 I've only scratched the surface of the power this old cell phone gives me over WaveBird controllers
    2002-07-04 8.24 1,937 0 Whoa, guys, make sure you're not on any fault lines when you light that thing off...
    2002-07-03 6.54 2,606 1 Nothing but me, Maxim magazine, and the Neverwinter Nights ad... A night for ROMANCE.
    2002-07-02 7.52 1,635 0 Professor Lyons of MIT explains how Neverwinter scripting works
    2002-07-01 8.46 2,117 2 Reporting to you LIVE from the observation mode of Bl00dLu5t's Tribes II server...
    2002-06-29 8 1,293 0 An important message from your neighborhood secret operative
    2002-06-28 8.57 2,438 1 I can totally wig out my neighbor's WaveBird with this old cellular phone
    2002-06-27 8.06 1,731 1 Pirates hacked my webserver ... but they filled it full of Warez!
    2002-06-26 7.76 1,565 0 Val-U-Ware's Virtual Bowler 3D did little to prepare me for the actual bowling experience
    2002-06-25 8.29 2,011 0 We got no choice but to send in Earls. He's the best camper this army's got.
    2002-06-22 8.95 2,372 0 I was irradiated by a failed Game Boy backlight installation
    2002-06-21 8.37 1,912 1 The Army has a videogame? Big deal, the 'CIA Black Ops' game has been out for years. In secret.
    2002-06-20 8.34 2,005 0 Note to staff: Please refrain from screaming "FRAWRESS VICTORRRY" whenever important Japanese clients are visting
    2002-06-19 5.99 1,734 0 Your new GameSpy design with its giant Jango Fett frightens me
    2002-06-18 6.83 1,435 0 Pilgrimage, we must make, to the world's largest Yoda
    2002-06-17 6.87 1,838 0 Say what? I can't hear you over the miserable howling Jigglypuff cacophony!
    2002-06-15 7.73 2,385 0 I just had the best and worst arcade experience of my life
    2002-06-14 6.88 2,275 0 No way man, she's hot for me! Just LOOK at the emoticons she's using!
    2002-06-13 7.56 2,991 0 I swear I saw some Blizzard Programmers eating lunch at El Pollo Loco yesterday
    2002-06-12 7.22 2,224 1 To fully unlock the mysteries of the Harry Potter DVD, we had to call in Percy
    2002-06-11 9.03 2,734 1 There were disastrous consequences to installing a backlight to my Game Boy Advance
    2002-06-08 8.42 2,818 0 My Super Smash Bros. skillz have led me on an odyssey to the lowest depths of humanity
    2002-06-07 8.54 2,295 1 The kid wouldn't step away from the Zero Gunner machine; what's a guy to do?
    2002-06-06 6.62 2,135 0 Top ten things I will do for your Neverwinter Nights beta CD...
    2002-06-05 6 2,426 1 When Star Wars Galaxies comes out, y'all know where I'm gonna be.
    2002-06-04 6.83 2,727 0 Don't kick me off of your game service — my mom was out of control on here last night
    2002-06-01 8.4 2,881 1 Occasionally a man has to throw down for the woman he loves
    2002-05-31 8.54 2,484 2 A woman can't let true love stand in the way of mad skillz.
    2002-05-30 7.34 2,434 2 There are two ways to play Super Smash Brothers, my young padawan. There's a light side. And a dark side.
    2002-05-29 8.25 2,472 4 My girlfriend kicks my ass at Super Smash Brothers Melee ... using the Princess
    2002-05-28 5.79 2,102 0 Okay, you run forward, I'll punch the goalie
    2002-05-25 8.48 2,928 0 This whole E3 convention business is like hitting the swag mother lode
    2002-05-24 8.8 3,173 1 This fake Mario costume changed what should've been the happiest day of my life into a howling nightmare of sweat and foam
    2002-05-23 8.81 2,877 1 My uncanny resemblance to gaming superstar Shigeru Miyamoto encouraged my friends to hatch a nefarious scheme
    2002-05-22 6.71 2,156 0 This Nintendo Booth Was Built Atop the Carpeted Remains of Your Forefathers
    2002-05-21 7.48 2,240 1 Attention Citizens of Morrowind: I Wish to Make Public My Request that You ‘Bring It.’
    2002-05-20 6.61 2,342 0 Hear me out — Our Asheron's Call monarchy would be considerably more powerful with its own clone army.
    2002-05-18 8.67 1,959 0 Morrowind has taught me a valuable life's lesson: How to steal everything that isn't nailed down
    2002-05-17 7.06 1,631 1 Professor Lyons of MIT explains how to get Morrowind to work with your 3D card
    2002-05-16 8.16 1,739 0 My new boss is a micromanaging narcoleptic
    2002-05-15 8 2,278 0 Step aside! This Star Wars line is getting out of hand.
    2002-05-14 7.82 1,844 1 I disagree. A broadsword to the head wouldn't hurt if you were wearing good armor.
    2002-05-13 5.26 1,798 0 I can end troublesome lens flares Forever!
    2002-05-11 9.39 8,135 6 Simultaneously attending an EverQuest wedding and a job interview is not a trivial exercise. Fortunately, I always have a backup plan.
    2002-05-10 7.48 1,885 1 It's sad but true that a hamster's squeaky wheel can drive a gamer to the brink of insanity
    2002-05-09 8.76 1,720 2 The delicious, sizzling scent of barbecue is disrupting my game of Morrowind
    2002-05-08 7.84 1,687 0 Extra extra! Read about it here! 5 slain in briefcase-camping incident!
    2002-05-07 7.8 1,966 0 Mr. Pickles has issues with my new optical mouse.
    2002-05-06 6.9 1,542 0 Just because you CAN play the Mario theme song with your armpits, doesn't mean you NEED to.
    2002-05-04 7.86 1,969 0 Further studies have confirmed that Chinchillas and PC gaming just don't mix.
    2002-05-03 7.43 2,049 0 Monitor radiation cured my cancer!
    2002-05-02 6.03 1,860 0 How do I decide what to buy? The real turning point for me is how quickly a game comes out with a Boba Fett mod.
    2002-05-01 9.18 5,682 4 As a former SysAdmin, I always have a backup plan.
    2002-04-30 8.32 2,157 0 My PC speaker began emitting noises almost wholly unlike "music."
    2002-04-29 5.95 2,177 0 I like to both cut AND paste.
    2002-04-27 8.77 2,304 0 It’s easy to sneak these new, smaller PC game boxes into the house. But that’s not always a good thing.
    2002-04-26 7.74 1,716 1 A word of caution regarding PC cooling fans and chinchillas:
    2002-04-25 7.05 1,778 0 Those of us with foresight ensure that our post-apocalyptic survival bunkers are equipped with FilePlanet accounts.
    2002-04-24 7.54 1,637 0 Eyah! Stop it! If you keep playing that Spider-Man game you'll ruin the movie!
    2002-04-23 6.96 1,737 0 You will never defeat my optimal Age of Empires development path!
    2002-04-22 6.29 1,387 0 What I need is one of those "kick 'em in the jimmies" lawyers
    2002-04-20 6.75 1,745 0 It’s horrifying times like these that a man has to ask himself: What would The Rock do?
    2002-04-19 8.1 1,893 1 These new smaller PC boxes are great, I can sneak ‘em in the house without my wife seeing
    2002-04-18 7.84 1,620 1 AN AUDIT!? I knew I shouldn't have let those guys on the forums do my taxes!
    2002-04-17 7.62 1,777 0 In regards to the last Krispy Kreme doughnut:
    2002-04-16 5.14 1,781 0 It looks like playing Agent Under Fire will have to wait until after "Walkies."
    2002-04-15 6.19 2,004 0 Global Operations’ Intel character class allows me to fulfill at long last my natural inclination to command
    2002-04-13 9.13 2,935 0 There comes a time in every man’s life when he asks himself: What would Solid Snake do?
    2002-04-12 8.91 2,472 1 A grievous typo on our prom leaflets invited the seniors to 'Bring a Date to the 2002 Pr0n'
    2002-04-11 8.06 1,670 0 Here on MY server, I like to focus on attractive Dungeon Siege gardening
    2002-04-10 6.97 1,645 0 Gary Gygax appeared to me in a dream last night ... wearing studded leather pants!
    2002-04-09 8.68 2,258 0 Shut up you guys. If there was a "band camp" video game, I'd OWN.
    2002-04-08 7.63 1,887 0 Thanks to a catastrophic miscalculation regarding daylight savings time, our 60-minute clan match lasted approximately 13.6 seconds.
    2002-04-06 8.62 2,274 3 It's amazing the depths of depravity you can explore with a humble PS2 fishing controller
    2002-04-05 5.95 1,554 0 Will these PaRappa chains make me look cool? I gotta believe!
    2002-04-04 8.47 2,667 1 I bought an EverQuest Level 43 Barbarian Shaman off of a disreputable auction site ... but at what cost?
    2002-04-03 7.81 2,171 1 My girlfriend is what you would call a ... "Freedom Forcer."
    2002-04-02 9.26 7,106 3 When I forgot my access card this morning, I was forced to go Metal Gear Solid freestyle at the office
    2002-04-01 7.15 1,512 0 This base has been in my family for years
    2002-03-30 8.57 1,938 1 Great care must be taken when removing a PS2 controller from one’s privates
    2002-03-29 8.49 1,413 2 You haven’t really played Virtua Fighter 4 until you’ve busted out the Shaolin style with a fishing controller.
    2002-03-28 7.63 1,857 0 I lost 30 gigs of pr0n in that last blackout
    2002-03-27 7.27 1,735 0 I’m gonna whomp you so hard, they might as well cue the sad French horns.
    2002-03-26 7.06 1,660 0 Stop! Don’t move an inch! My Super Mario Advance cartridge is lost somewhere in the shag carpet.
    2002-03-25 8.17 2,321 1 Wooo-hooo! You were my one-millionth player kill!
    2002-03-23 8.14 1,581 0 When you think of high end graphics, I want you to think about Mi-A55.
    2002-03-22 7.13 1,435 0 The secret to good game design is nothing less than soft, sensual, knee-length hair
    2002-03-21 5.76 1,049 0 You're just not playing Xbox football unless they're bringing out the chains
    2002-03-20 7.76 1,487 0 Deciphering the damn Jedi Starfighter backstory is like reading the A&E channel
    2002-03-19 8.64 1,881 2 Removal of this PS2 controller will require a licensed OBGYN
    2002-03-18 5.84 1,262 0 It is man’s ultimate ambition to achieve perfect balance in life, in love, and in Tony Hawk
    2002-03-16 7.73 1,772 1 My NEW Empire Earth scenario is more than unbeatable ... it's divinely inspired
    2002-03-15 8.46 1,316 0 God bless America! In the land of opportunity, scooter-entrepreneurs like myself can score an easy Xbox.
    2002-03-14 7.34 2,153 1 She wants to solve Diablo II together? Are you sure you're ready for that kind of commitment?
    2002-03-13 7.12 1,622 1 Are you kidding me? The cartoon kitty could totally kick Clippy the Paperclip's ass
    2002-03-12 8.58 2,601 1 Sir, I Really Think It's a Bad Idea to Call Our New 3D Card 'the GeForce 5 Mi-A55'
    2002-03-11 6.77 2,402 0 Baby, I Put the ‘Romance’ in ‘Necromancer’
    2002-03-09 8.84 1,808 4 You Got to Fight for Your Right to Play 'M' Rated Games! Testify!
    2002-03-08 7.5 1,189 1 I'm the Last Line of Defense between America's Youth and the Destabilizing Influence of Such Subversive Games as WWF Raw
    2002-03-07 8.37 2,161 2 Not Even God Himself Can Defeat My Empire Earth Scenario!
    2002-03-06 6.84 1,474 1 Son, You're Not Thinking of Fighting the Powah, Are You?
    2002-03-05 7.66 2,782 3 In Hindsight, Camping outside the Software Store in Anticipation of TeamFortress 2 Was Probably a Bad Idea.
    2002-03-04 7.06 1,739 3 This Weekend My Friend Kip Taught Me All about Starting Mall Riots
    2002-03-02 7.7 2,016 0 The Secret to My Artistic Success Lies Not from Being the Man, but in Pretending That I'm Being the Man
    2002-03-01 6.22 2,243 4 The World Conspires to Keep 'State of Emergency' Out of My Innocent, Childlike Hands
    2002-02-12 8.05 420 0 The Daily Victim Returns March 1, 2002!
    2002-01-16 6.71 632 0 If They Bring Back the Daily Victim, I Promise — I'll Wax More than My Hands
    2001-09-25 5.41 2,244 1 Find an Artist? Hell, I Need to Find a Lawyer!
    2001-09-19 5.69 962 0 A New Daily Victim Artist Is on the Horizon ... Sadly, Not Here.
    2001-09-17 6.49 798 0 The Search Continues
    2001-09-14 5.4 1,132 3 The Search for a New Daily Victim Artist Begins
    2001-09-11 6.4 1,591 0 First My Gut! Will My Tribes Skillz Be Next?
    2001-09-10 7.52 1,121 0 The Tireless Work of Men like Me Keeps Atari's 'E.T.' from Falling into the Wrong Hands
    2001-09-08 8.31 2,296 0 Unreal Tournament Got Me into College
    2001-09-07 9.18 2,744 0 Despite All Efforts My Pet Cow Has Completed a Long Slow Harrowing Descent into Depravity
    2001-09-06 5.45 1,316 0 If You Guys Had Just Talked to Me before You Released Arcanum...
    2001-09-05 6.69 1,679 0 Explain to Me Again Why Inverting Your Mouselook Is a Good Thing?
    2001-09-04 6.9 1,253 0 This Indiana Jones Pinball Game Ate My Balls!
    2001-09-03 7.51 1,396 0 Crack Soldier of Fortune, Reporting for Duty Sir!
    2001-09-01 7.95 1,517 0 Spam Mail Is the Only Fulfilling Thing in My Life
    2001-08-31 7.35 1,126 0 I Found a New Game Setup That Helps Compensate for My Attention Deficit Disorder
    2001-08-30 8.32 2,274 1 Thanks to Unreal Tournament, I Was Kicked Out of the S.A.T. Exams
    2001-08-29 6.31 1,206 0 Ahhh, the Forces of Terror Are Again at Bay. at Least until the Next Round Starts.
    2001-08-28 7.74 1,515 1 The End User License Agreement Provided No Protection for My Ovaries
    2001-08-27 6.25 1,389 3 Want to Trade Your Fungus Covered Scale Tunic? I Can Offer You a Human Baby in Return.
    2001-08-25 9.23 5,488 0 Messing with People Who Play Majestic Is Probably a Really Bad Idea
    2001-08-24 6.47 1,182 0 I Killed for the Motor City Online Beta
    2001-08-23 6.32 1,003 0 I Was Victimized by My Star Wars Galaxies Player Association
    2001-08-22 7.69 1,767 0 You Only Love Me Because of My Unreal Tournament Skills! and Because I Have a Great Body.
    2001-08-21 6.99 1,335 0 One Game of Nine-ball Is All It Takes for Me to Reduce a Human Being to a Shrieking Mass of Infantile Garbage
    2001-08-20 8.23 2,231 1 I Solicited Spam Mail to Stop the Lonliness
    2001-08-18 9.17 2,725 2 Those Fewls Insist I Abandon the Glove and the Dark Feedback-forcing Arts It Embodies
    2001-08-17 5.38 1,989 0 Look Out! He's Using the Big Mouse!
    2001-08-16 9.46 15,872 2 Our New Office Passtime Is Messin' with the Guy Who Plays Majestic
    2001-08-15 8.55 1,575 0 His Identity Remains a Mystery, but the Legend Has Only Begun
    2001-08-14 7.24 1,482 0 Your Game Needs More Near-nudity
    2001-08-13 5.28 846 0 Gads! Will Ye Robber Barons Ever Layoff of Mine Union Pacific Railroad?
    2001-08-11 8.18 2,220 1 Egah! What Have I Done?
    2001-08-10 8.32 1,764 2 I Remind You That I and I Alone Have the Power
    2001-08-09 7.05 1,311 0 Dude, You Just Optomize This Yo-yo and You'd Get Twice the Rebound and 40% Better Spin
    2001-08-08 7.13 1,439 0 Fine, Date My Little Sister. Just Don't Expect Me to Defuse the Bomb for You Anymore!
    2001-08-07 4.89 1,524 0 Just One Nibble and Them Hedgehogs Will Know the Meaning of 'Pain.'
    2001-08-06 6.42 1,217 1 Tell Ma I Done Gone to Austin to Be a Rich and Famous Game Developer
    2001-08-04 7.77 1,471 0 Son, Adults Learn to Share the Havoc Heavy Transport
    2001-08-03 7.74 1,309 1 It's Your Turn to Clean the Fridge, and Might I Remind You You're One Snip Away from Complete Dsl Blackout!
    2001-08-02 7.27 1,575 0 From Hell's Heart I Stab at Thee, for Hate's Sake I Spit My Last Dodgeball at Thee
    2001-08-01 7.21 1,295 0 Dad Plugged in the Hairdryer Two Hours into the Daytona 500 and Blew My Whole PC
    2001-07-31 6.68 1,202 0 My Winning Counter-strike Strategy: a Two-pronged Attack of Both Tai-chi and Mouse Sensitivity
    2001-07-30 7.5 1,272 0 'Enjoy' My Vacation? Lemme Tell You Something about Cruise Ships: No Cable Modems
    2001-07-28 9.12 2,328 0 I Had Nothing to Do with the Hellish Fury That Followed the Gran Turismo 3 Tournament
    2001-07-27 8.11 794 1 I Ask That, before You Use My 1000-Watt Simulated Racing Seat, You Please Use the Potty.
    2001-07-26 7.01 910 3 Are You Kidding Me? This Drives Nothing like My Dodge Viper
    2001-07-25 8.09 867 2 Your Skill at 'Racing' Pales in Comparison to My Targeted High-speed Demolition Tactics
    2001-07-24 7.94 918 5 I Will Win ... the Beetle Cup
    2001-07-23 6.97 968 5 If My Missing PS2 Memory Card Does Not Resurface, I'm Going to Order a Full-on Pants Drop
    2001-07-22 9.15 3,180 0 My Reign as the Most Effective Tribes 2 Suicide Pilot Was Traumatically Cut Short When I Lived for over Five Consecutive Minutes
    2001-07-20 5.68 1,518 0 You Haven't Really Entered the Game Development Community until You Own a Pair of Battery-operated Pants
    2001-07-19 6.88 1,222 0 Look, Your Software Store Stopped Carrying Codename Eagle. We Decided to Take Drastic Measures.
    2001-07-18 7.65 1,372 0 National Security Reasons Demand That These 'Punkbuster' Workarounds Do Not Fall into Enemy Hands
    2001-07-17 8.44 1,697 2 Son, It's Time We Talked about the Bases and the Bees...
    2001-07-16 8.11 1,468 0 How Can I Possibly Use the Keyboard to Play Games When the Cartoonist Only Gives Me Four Fingers?
    2001-07-14 8.33 1,258 0 My Clan Forced Me into the Grenade Clinic
    2001-07-13 8.43 1,579 0 My Tribes Game Was Destroyed by an Errant Car Alarm
    2001-07-12 6.58 1,294 0 Boxes That Make Noise and React to Me When I Push Buttons — That's All I Need to Be Happy.
    2001-07-11 8.83 1,959 1 Your Keen Skills at Setting up Base Defenses Are No Match for My Ability to Crash a Vehicle into Them
    2001-07-10 5.87 1,675 0 My Parents Opted for a 'Poor Man's' Net-nanny System
    2001-07-09 8.09 1,636 1 Whenever I Talk with Max, It Feels like One of Us Is Lagging
    2001-07-07 8.58 1,315 0 Many Games Undergoing Beta-testing Fail to Acknowledge the Valuable Wisdom Hardcore Gamers Can Give
    2001-07-06 6.3 1,437 0 My Approach to Playing Light Gun Games Is One-part Tj Hooker, One Part MTV's Jackass
    2001-07-05 7.31 1,287 1 Stella, No! You Push Down to Crouch, Then Press High-punch to Uppercut!
    2001-07-04 6.62 1,332 0 This Game You Bought Me Isn't SSX. and You're Not My Real Mom.
    2001-07-03 8.77 1,517 1 I'm Addicted to TeamFortress Hallucinogen Grenades
    2001-07-02 7.41 1,376 0 Please, Distract My Fiance While I Sneak a PS2 onto Our Wedding Gift Registry
    2001-06-30 8.77 1,764 1 My Adoration of the Atari 2600 Knew No Limits ... until Yesterday.
    2001-06-29 8.17 1,385 0 Sure, Sure Yeh, My Wife's a Better Sniper than Me. but I'm Still the Flag-runner of This Household.
    2001-06-28 7.08 1,405 0 My Father Came Back from the Grave with an Important Announcement
    2001-06-27 7.18 1,458 1 Silence! Game Designer Derek Smart's Name Must Only Be Spoken in Hushed Tones
    2001-06-26 6.58 1,191 2 The Secret to 4X4 Evolution, My Son, Is to Become One with the Road.
    2001-06-25 7.85 1,661 0 I Wish They'd Stop Coming Out with Genre-busting Video Games — It's Ruining My Whole Filing Scheme.
    2001-06-23 8.27 2,490 0 My Ex-boyfriend Plays for the Other Team
    2001-06-22 8.68 1,748 1 The Best Birthday Present I Ever Got? a Roll of Quarters.
    2001-06-21 6.45 1,502 1 I Have Seen All Three Screenshots for This New Game That Was Just Announced and Lemme Tell You How Bad It's Going to Suck.
    2001-06-20 8.29 1,840 0 I Pre-ordered an X-BOX, and That's When the Bad Things Happened.
    2001-06-19 6.89 1,598 0 Nothing Says Whacky Online Fun like a Flashbang in the Face of a Teammate! Ho Ho Ho!
    2001-06-18 7.15 1,257 0 It's a Damn Shame What They Did to That Fourth Pac-man Ghost
    2001-06-15 8.21 2,460 2 An Extremely Talented Individual — like Myself — Can Eat an Entire Hot Dog During the Loading Screen of an SSX Map
    2001-06-14 8.46 2,715 1 I Would Never Date a Man Who Builds a Havoc Heavy Transport and Then Takes off with Two Empty Seats
    2001-06-13 7.45 1,445 1 Welcome to Tony Scirocco's Online Macdown
    2001-06-12 7.5 1,344 0 Well Guys, after All Four of Us Bought Gameboy Advance, We've No Money Left for Food and Nothing to Eat but a Solid Brick of Velveeta Cheese.
    2001-06-11 7.91 1,566 0 Sorry Guys, I Can't Play in Our Tribes Match Tonight. I'm Temporarily Unable to Use the Mouse and Keyboard at the Same Time.
    2001-06-09 8 1,485 0 We Had an Incredibly Sordid Experience Removing the Hootie and the Blowfish CD from Charlie's Dreamcast
    2001-06-08 8.15 1,893 1 Jim Always Plays the Wermacht in WWII Games
    2001-06-07 8.38 1,611 0 These Coin-operated Web Servers Were a Bad Idea
    2001-06-06 8.68 1,803 1 Oh Man. Today a High School Kid Is Going to Shadow Me for 'Career Day,' So I Have to Pretend to Work
    2001-06-05 7.65 1,509 1 My Neverwinter Nights Server Is Just Going to Be a Place for Characters to Get Drunk and Party
    2001-06-04 6.69 1,271 0 Sherry's Magnetic Poetry Is Becoming Increasingly Violent towards Our PS2
    2001-06-03 8.97 1,870 0 My Arch Gaming Nemisis Was in a Body Cast, Yet He Still Talked Smack
    2001-06-01 5.8 1,252 0 Forget Everything You've Heard, I Have the X-treme Game of the Future
    2001-05-31 6.27 1,235 1 Gentlemen, This New 'X-treme' Game Concept Will Leave You Piddling Your Boxers with Joy.
    2001-05-30 7.98 1,793 0 To Get My Husband off of the Computer, I Had to Fake Not Having a Headache
    2001-05-29 8.21 1,623 2 Give Charlie a Chance to Cool Down — for the Last Six Weeks He's Had a Hootie and the Blowfish CD Jammed in His Dreamcast
    2001-05-26 8.53 1,926 1 This Weekend's Tribute to the Armed Forces Will Take Place in My Bathtub.
    2001-05-25 8.68 2,259 1 I Refused to Allow My Broken Arm to Hinder My Deathmatch Skillz
    2001-05-24 8.12 1,510 1 What Salon.com Fails to Realize Is That I Dressed like a Pimp Long before I Became a Game Developer
    2001-05-23 8.54 1,632 1 This Whole E3 Gaming Convention Is a Hostile Environment for Gruff the Learning Dog.
    2001-05-22 8.15 1,220 0 I Am Trapped in the Ass End of a Hellish Excuse for a Gaming Convention
    2001-05-21 8.27 1,568 1 Seriously, Some Kid's Head Actually Popped When He Saw Star Wars Galaxies.
    2001-05-19 7.78 1,929 2 My Secret N1NJ4 Mission to E3 Was a Dismal Failure
    2001-05-18 5.94 1,196 0 I Am Tired of the Media Portraying Those of Us Who Dress Freakish and Wierd as Freaks and Weirdos.
    2001-05-17 7.92 1,706 0 Quick Naps in between Map-changes and Respawns Enable the Skilled Gamer to Play CTF for 48 Straight Hours
    2001-05-16 7.02 1,075 0 His Preparation for the Upcoming Tournament Involves a Solid Hour of Meat Beat Manifesto.
    2001-05-15 7.46 1,592 0 I Finally Solved Goonies 2 for the NES!
    2001-05-14 8.66 2,115 1 It Is Dangerous to Bathe During an Everquest Game
    2001-05-12 9.14 3,802 1 My Ping Is Tingling! Trouble Is Afoot!
    2001-05-11 7.75 1,311 0 Notes on the Proper Use of Homing Pigeons for Counter-strike Combat
    2001-05-10 8.47 1,631 0 My New CPU Fan Makes Noises That Only Dogs Can Hear
    2001-05-09 7.49 1,785 0 Stop Destroying My Base! Only the Innocents Remain!
    2001-05-08 9.21 8,192 3 As an Arcade Attendant of Five Years, I Can Say with Certainty That Creeping Horror Is Not a Usual Fixture of Palace Park Amusements.
    2001-05-07 5.45 1,724 0 Getting Those Tiny CD Headphones Lodged in My Ear Wasn't the Worst Part of My Day...
    2001-05-05 8.64 1,847 0 Gamers like Myself Are Often Inconsiderate of Our Friends' Feelings, Particularly When We Destroy Them.
    2001-05-04 6.73 1,559 0 Wow, a Whole Quarter. What Shall I Spend It on? a Driving Game, a Fighting Game, or a Light Gun Game?
    2001-05-03 8.3 2,217 2 I Put the 'Ow' in 'Low Ping'
    2001-05-02 7.44 1,521 1 Excuse Me, Sir, You Failed to Signal before Crashing That Bomber into a Mountain.
    2001-05-01 7.49 1,434 0 You Kids Wouldn't Happen to Know Why Our Swimming Pool Is Empty and Covered with Skate-board Marks, Would You?
    2001-04-30 7.97 1,417 0 Please! Wear Headphones When You Play Tribes 2 — You're Ruining Godfather Night!
    2001-04-28 8.83 2,744 0 Mr. Jacobson, You Need to Spend More Time Researching Your Papers and Less Time Playing Tribes 2. Furthermore, You Have No Jetpack Skillz.
    2001-04-27 8.89 1,878 3 These Freakish Puzzle Games Bring Me No Delight Whatsoever!
    2001-04-26 6.93 1,535 1 Sherry and I Bought a PS2 Together. That's a Pretty Serious Step!
    2001-04-25 6.69 1,413 0 Good Hygiene Is Important When You and Your Roommate Share PC Microphones
    2001-04-24 7.62 2,871 0 In Retrospect It Was a Bad Idea to Mercillesly Taunt That Asheron's Call Admin
    2001-04-23 8.04 2,595 0 My Girlfriend Manifests Her Dissatisfaction with Our Relationship by Placing Me in an Enormous Mound of Poop.
    2001-04-21 8.06 2,025 0 Kids, I Think It's Very Important You Understand That Daddy's Network Cable Is Not to Be Used to Pull Your Razer Scooter Out of a Mud Puddle.
    2001-04-20 7.21 1,373 1 I'm All Good with Us Buying Out Another Company, but I Take Issue with the Amount of Salmon Jerky We Acquired as Part of the Deal.
    2001-04-19 8.71 2,599 2 Mr. Henderson, I Take Issue with Your Most Recent Thesis, Entitled 'C1V1L W4R: 4 7URN1NG P01N7 1N 4M3R1C4N H1S70RY'
    2001-04-18 7.35 1,365 0 Having Played Crazy Taxi for Six Straight Hours I Cannot Control the Urge to Drive Dangerously Fast to the Nearest Kentucky Fried Chicken
    2001-04-17 7.93 1,542 0 Damn My Fat, Fat Fingers!
    2001-04-13 8.95 1,829 1 The Daily Victim Easter Special
    2001-04-12 8.47 1,388 2 Failure to Blink During an Intense Game of Tribes 2 Has Hardened My Contact Lenses beyond Repair
    2001-04-11 8.04 1,490 0 Are You a Wargamer or Some Kind of Communist!?
    2001-04-10 7.64 1,563 1 I Simply Refuse to Play Any Game That Cannot Correctly Calculate the Muzzle Velocity of a German Panzer IV's 75MM Main Gun.
    2001-04-09 7.62 1,410 0 Friend, Consider These Money-saving Tips
    2001-04-07 8.15 1,844 2 Games That Have Only Limited Supplies of Ammo, but Let Me Quicksave, Might as Well Just Give Me Unlimited Ammo.
    2001-04-06 7.52 1,683 0 Dude, You Really Can't Complain about Player-killing When You Join a Diablo 2 Server Named 'Kill Kill PVP Mad Duelz I Will Own J00'
    2001-04-05 8.42 1,844 1 Kids, You See Mr. Happy Snake? You Leave Mr. Happy Snake inside the Wall or Daddy Gets Very Angry!
    2001-04-04 5.63 1,602 0 'While Mr.scales Remains Undefeated in C&C Tournament Play, I'm Afraid He Remains Unavailable for Comment.'
    2001-04-03 7.53 1,394 1 With My New GeForce 3 I Can Run SETI@Home Even While Playing Sacrifice
    2001-04-02 7.14 1,507 0 My Greatest Website Hack of All Time, and Everyone Thought It Was an April Fools Joke
    2001-03-31 8.43 1,745 1 I Spent Weeks Training My Monkey to Be the First to Grab Tribes 2 at the Store, but Things Went Oh So Very Wrong
    2001-03-30 7.23 2,217 0 Why Doesn't This Warez Server Have Any Decent Customer Support!?
    2001-03-29 8.6 2,597 1 No Cringer, You Sniveling Whore, You're Supposed to Eat the Villagers!
    2001-03-28 8.63 2,065 1 Hi. I'm Mike. I'm a Saveaholic.
    2001-03-27 7.98 1,524 0 How Could All Twelve of You Guys Buy Me the Exact Same Game for My Birthday? Don't You Ever Talk?
    2001-03-26 8.11 1,543 0 Today Me and Mr. Stuffnfluf Will Show You How to Correctly Assault Counter-Strike's cs_militia Map
    2001-03-24 7.79 1,420 0 No, No — Put That Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo Away! It'll Suck Your Soul!
    2001-03-23 8.25 1,459 1 I Trained My Monkey to Squeal Whenever Someone Takes Our Flag
    2001-03-22 7.22 1,371 0 Reactions Were Mixed When I Came Back from Lunch and Started Biting Ankles
    2001-03-21 7.71 1,276 1 Hasbro Has Filed an Injunction against My Punk Rock Band, 'The Frogger Gods.'
    2001-03-20 8.33 1,487 0 Back off! I Have a Stapler!
    2001-03-19 7.16 1,140 0 I Had a Very Harrowing Atari Pitfall Experience as a Small Child.
    2001-03-17 8.3 1,355 0 I Made the Mistake of Telling My Wife That I Think the Dungeon Siege Farmer Chick Is Hot.
    2001-03-16 6.72 1,254 2 Want to Know How I Scored 4 Million in One Round of Tony Hawk? Simple. I Waxed My Hands.
    2001-03-15 8.32 1,503 1 No — No Way Man — Keep That Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo Away from Me! I Have a Chemistry Exam Tomorrow!
    2001-03-13 7.98 2,035 3 No Photography Allowed into the Microsoft Gamestock Event? We'll See about That...
    2001-03-12 7.74 1,803 0 I Have to Pee but I Can't Leave My PC Because I Really like the Next Map
    2001-03-10 8.98 2,033 0 Players Have Yet to Discover That I Intentionally Set up My Unreal Tournament Server to Kill Them All in Embarassing Ways!
    2001-03-09 7.99 1,607 1 Yeeaahhh, This Uh, 'Chip' the Guy Sold You to Play Pirate Games on Your Playstation ... Is a Potato Chip.
    2001-03-08 7.94 1,292 1 Dude, Never Comment on Another Woman's Mags in Front of Your Wife
    2001-03-07 7.05 1,295 0 Someone Moved the Little Plastic Indian That Was Standing on Top of My Monitor
    2001-03-06 6.98 1,034 1 AK, Jes, I See Fortunes from Za Gibs
    2001-03-05 7.37 1,256 0 We Have to Cross Out 'Fun,' It Just Didn't Fit in with Our New Game's Business Model
    2001-03-03 7.73 1,061 1 Thank You for the Cards and Letters I Received regarding the Alien Popping Out of My Stomach
    2001-03-02 4.81 1,778 1 Watch Me Now as I Sing along with the Deus Ex Theme!
    2001-03-01 8.52 1,864 2 I Have Sewn the Seeds of Mass Hysteria on My Unreal Tournament Server!
    2001-02-28 8.18 1,466 0 Dad Says His New Dragonslayer +9 Is like the Son He Never Had
    2001-02-27 7.97 1,346 0 I Find Myself Crippled with Paralyzing Fear Whenever I Try to Climb Down a Ladder in an FPS Game
    2001-02-26 8.14 1,467 0 My Resolution Is So High That I Can't See the Bomb in Counter-strike
    2001-02-24 8.19 1,267 0 Daily Victim: Kung Fu Theatre
    2001-02-23 7.95 1,331 0 I Have a Dream.
    2001-02-22 8.63 1,291 1 If Tribes 2 Is Delayed Again, I Will Rip My Own Face off
    2001-02-21 6.02 1,248 1 This Is from My New Album: I'm Going to Rip Open Your Stomach and Devour the Partially Digested Contents
    2001-02-20 7.68 1,484 0 Gronk Job — Put PC Speakers into Cardboard Box.
    2001-02-19 6.41 1,325 2 Hey! That Was My Foot! That Was My Fury!
    2001-02-17 8.42 1,254 0 My Ingenious Plan to Win the Instagib Match by Re-routing the Air Conditioners Has Backfired
    2001-02-16 7.96 1,442 0 C'moff It! That State Trooper Was Totally Camping the Intersection!
    2001-02-15 9.16 3,689 3 That Creep Crenshaw Always Turns the Air Conditioner on Just before Our 5:30 Deathmatch
    2001-02-14 7.92 1,640 1 No No, Pikapuppy, I Don't Choose You!
    2001-02-13 7.24 1,229 0 If They Can Plop a Robot Probe on a Hunk of Rock a Million Miles Away from Earth, Why Can't They Invent a Fallout:tactics Demo That Downloads Faster?
    2001-02-12 7.24 1,572 0 I Can't for the Life of Me Figure Out *Slurp* the Reason My Keyboard Is So Sticky
    2001-02-10 9.17 5,172 10 Woe, I Say, Woe upon Thee Who Trifle with the Devine Server Administrator!
    2001-02-09 6.7 1,507 2 How Do I Win All My LAN Parties? I Credit the Sauce!
    2001-02-08 6.78 2,201 1 I Will Kick Your Scrawny Chess Ass
    2001-02-07 8.32 1,180 1 What!? You're Turning the Mens' Room Back into a Ladies' Room Again? Good God Man, You Can't Let Them Back in There!
    2001-02-06 7.6 1,608 0 I'm Not Going to Say You Were "0WNED" by My Baby Daughter, Exactly, but She Did Dominate You in a Decisive Manner.
    2001-02-05 8.14 1,644 1 I'm Not Naked in Real Life, but I Play a Naked Person on My PC.
    2001-02-03 8.48 1,353 0 There's a Perfectly Legitimate Business Reason I Stormed into the Quarterly Fiscal Review Half-naked and Reeking of Alcohol
    2001-02-02 7.67 1,263 0 You'll Have to Pardon Thomas. This Morning He Had to Dismantle and Reassemble His PC, and All He Had Was a Butter Knife.
    2001-02-01 7.39 1,437 1 There's a Broadsword Embedded in the Entertainment Center? Quick, Hand It Back! I'm Fighting Claw Vipers!
    2001-01-31 8.43 1,619 3 I Don't Think the Job Interview Went Well
    2001-01-30 8.57 2,247 1 Mock Ye the Arcane Arts of Unix Server Administration!?
    2001-01-29 7.86 1,276 0 There's a New Rules Marshall on This Here Baldur's Gate Server
    2001-01-27 8.18 1,106 0 California Power Blackouts Continue. the Search for Non-digital Entertainment Grows Desperate.
    2001-01-26 8.29 1,927 4 Hello, and Welcome to Gaming Gigabuys. Kill Me.
    2001-01-25 8.16 1,352 1 This Fancy-schmancy Office Chair Is a Killer of Men and Destroyer of Souls!
    2001-01-24 8.76 1,639 2 You Understand, I Lost My Pants on a Worms Armageddon Bet. It Was Foolish, but I Had the Sheep, and Thought I Could Do No Wrong.
    2001-01-23 7.36 1,208 0 That "Tomb Invader" Woman Needs a Good Swift Caning!
    2001-01-22 7.64 1,234 0 And Bob, Next Door? Camper. S'true! I Saw It!
    2001-01-20 8.25 1,717 1 You Want to Talk Surround Sound? Why Stop at 5.1? I've Got an 8.6 Speaker System
    2001-01-19 7.1 1,490 0 Impossible! How Could He Possibly Have Killed Me? My Bunny Hopping Was Flawless in Both Planning and Execution!
    2001-01-18 8.63 2,269 2 California's Rolling Power Blackouts Have Reduced Me to Wholly Unsatisfying Forms of Manual Analog Entertainment
    2001-01-17 7.22 1,359 0 You Want a Piece of Me? You Want a Piece of Me!? I'm Available to Kick Your Ass Anywhere between 3:15 and 3:45 PM PST Today
    2001-01-16 6.94 1,410 0 Hmmm... Susan? the People Downstairs Are Definitely Playing the Sims. Yeah ... Yeah I Think They Just Bought a Couch.
    2001-01-15 7.83 1,725 0 File Too Long Loading File Bad Not Here Yet Nnrrggmmgkk
    2001-01-13 8.44 1,338 0 'Kay Dad, I Understand the New Puppy Chewed up Your Gel Mouse Wrist-rest, I'm Just Saying There May Be a Logical Explanation
    2001-01-12 5.84 1,424 2 When It Comes to Online Gaming, I Find That the Mud Community Is the Best Place in Which to Mate with Animals.
    2001-01-11 8.14 1,315 1 C'mon Honey, How Else Am I Supposed to Hear If Someone Is Sneaking into the Flag Room?
    2001-01-10 7.69 1,566 3 Mom, Dad, Lay off My Everquest Addiction or I May Be Forced to Move Out of Your Basement.
    2001-01-09 6.72 1,204 0 These Crappy Ice Cubes Melt before the Map Even Changes!
    2001-01-08 6.95 1,059 0 It Takes a Little Tweaking Sometimes, but My Internet Reception Has Gone Way up.
    2001-01-06 8.33 1,718 1 I Have Several Theories as to How a Counter-strike Dedicated Server Managed to Find Its Way into Our Network Closet, Perhaps I Should Elaborate?
    2001-01-05 7.08 1,911 1 Look, I Just Design Websites. I Won't Be Your Girlfriend.
    2001-01-04 7.21 1,411 0 I'm Sorry Guys — *Sniff* — I Don't Feel Good. I Think I'm Going to Go to School Today Instead of Playing Unreal Tournament.
    2001-01-03 7.25 1,493 1 I Recommend You Give Me Your Lunch Money before I Go Down, Down-forward, Forward, Punch.
    2001-01-02 5.37 1,047 0 Courage. Honor. Dignity. Respect. These Are the Hallmarks of Clan TF Omega Ops.
    2000-12-30 7.33 1,190 1 If That Puppy Whizzes in My Yard One More Time I'm Gonna Decapitate Him with a Half-life CD!
    2000-12-29 6.09 1,864 0 Well, I Understand There's No Category for It, but You Have to Admit That This Pig Deserves Some Sort of Prize.
    2000-12-28 9.11 4,246 7 I Asked for the Quake 3 Expansion for Christmas, but All I Got Was a Stupid Puppy
    2000-12-27 6.51 1,225 0 Instead of Helping Me with My Problem, the Dude from Tech Support Took a Screenshot So He Could Show It to All His Friends.
    2000-12-23 9.2 3,465 2 The Daily Victim Christmas Special
    2000-12-22 7.76 1,341 3 Hot Diggity! This New Matrix Action Figure Sitting on Top of My Monitor Will Affirm My Status as a Badass!
    2000-12-21 7.58 1,116 2 You Call Yourself a Secret Santa!?
    2000-12-20 7.52 1,171 0 For God's Sake Get Down! If They See Us Running a Counter-strike Server Here We're Screwed!
    2000-12-19 8.66 1,690 1 Fools! Get Out of Here! A Half-life CD Is on the Loose!
    2000-12-18 8.25 1,337 4 I Am the King of Office Ganking!
    2000-12-16 8.06 1,385 2 I Swear to God If You Start Talking about Your Two Handed +3 Cursed Berserking Sword at My Company Christmas Party, I Will Slam You
    2000-12-15 6.06 1,994 2 Ever since That Last Counter-strike Patch, I Do Everything Akimbo
    2000-12-14 6.53 1,651 1 I Am Right and You Are Wrong, as Evidenced by the Immense Combined Power of the Diablo Characters Listed in My Signature
    2000-12-13 6.48 1,539 0 I Swear to God I Am Not Responsible for When They Nerfed the Manastone!
    2000-12-12 8.34 1,506 2 And Now, Crenshaw, Perhaps You'd like to Explain to Me Why My Favorite Mouse Is Covered in Potato Chip Grease?
    2000-12-11 7.47 1,178 0 I'm Tellin' Ya, "Rat in a Coke Can" Is Gonna Be the Biggest Internet Phenomena since Deep-fried Chicken Head!
    2000-12-09 7.41 956 2 I'm Sorry, Professor, I Can't Attend Your Lectures This Week Due to My Madden 2001 Injury.
    2000-12-08 7.48 1,163 1 Many Would Be Stunned or Horrified by the Sight of My "Tribes Hand," but I've Started to Grow Quite Fond of It
    2000-12-07 6.93 1,165 0 I Can Sum up Your Internet Problems in Three Words My Friend: Girl Scout Modem.
    2000-12-06 7.6 1,713 0 My Loss of Self-esteem Can Be Traced Back to the Loss of the TFC Super Concussion Grenade Jump
    2000-12-05 7.02 1,522 3 I Am a Dance Dance Revolutionary
    2000-12-04 7.5 1,389 2 The Middle of This End User License Agreement Contains a Freaky Paragraph in All Caps
    2000-12-02 7.83 1,471 1 There's Nothing Wrong with Playing Tribes in 200 X 150 Resolution
    2000-12-01 7.75 1,475 1 Tell Me about Your Day, Honey. I Promise Not to Fall Asleep This Time.
    2000-11-30 5.14 1,162 1 This New Game Can't Be Any Good — It Smells All Coconutty
    2000-11-29 8.45 1,490 1 Your Stupid Asheron's Call Addiction Is Causing Me Sperm Retention Headaches
    2000-11-28 6.08 1,100 0 Critics Agree! My New Game Kicks Ass ... or I Will Kick Yours!
    2000-11-27 4.8 981 0 Oh Man, This Tom Clancy Book Would Make a Crappy Computer Game
    2000-11-23 8.58 1,552 0 The Daily Victim Thanksgiving Special
    2000-11-22 7.05 1,423 1 The Remote Control Is under My Friend's Girlfriend's Ass
    2000-11-21 6.68 2,056 4 Psst, Would You like to Buy an Everquest Rubicite Breastplate? It Can Be Yours for the Low Low Price of a Single Human Baby.
    2000-11-20 7.6 1,158 1 It Was as Though the Hand of God Reached Down and Blessed Me Tonight at Palace Park Amusements
    2000-11-18 8.86 2,185 3 Good Morning Small Children. I'm Here to Explain to You How the Internet Works.
    2000-11-17 8.07 1,482 2 Hot Damn! the Ladies' Room Is Open Season!
    2000-11-16 5.71 1,178 0 Very Shortly There Will Be a Down-throwing of Some Sort of Gauntlet-like Object
    2000-11-15 8.19 1,807 2 My 14-Inch Monitor Is a Total Embarassment at LAN Parties
    2000-11-14 6.67 2,007 1 Papa! Papa! They Took Away My AK !
    2000-11-13 7.11 962 0 This Crap Is Nothing like Fishing on My PC
    2000-11-11 8.9 2,511 11 Night-shift Tech Support Is an Abyss of Pure, Screaming Horror
    2000-11-10 6.91 1,060 0 Seaman Is Damn Tasty!
    2000-11-09 7.68 660 0 The Dreamcast Is Sucking My Subconscious Mind
    2000-11-08 6.52 707 0 The Playstation's So-called "Emotion" Engine Fails to Give Me Even a Hint of Human Compassion
    2000-11-07 7.35 979 0 Honey, I Love You, but Don't See Any Reason to Leave This Perfectly Good Elite Force Server.
    2000-11-06 7.93 1,643 2 Woe to Ye, Internet Service Provider!
    2000-11-04 7.2 1,177 2 I Totally Woulda Scored with That Chick on the Tribes Server If My Roommate Hadn't Logged on and Started Talking Smack about My Momma
    2000-11-03 6.67 803 0 Failure to Drink Your Milk Will Result in Enormous Tentacles Devouring Your Body Whole
    2000-11-02 6.84 978 1 I Can Move Pikachu ... with My Mind!
    2000-11-01 6.97 1,025 1 Every Time Our Statistics Server Goes Down, I Will Cut off Someone's Ear
    2000-10-31 5.49 1,043 0 I Cannot Master the Torso Twist
    2000-10-30 7.55 1,352 1 The Zombies Cannot Possibly Kill Me When I'm This Wired on Jolt Cola
    2000-10-28 9.01 3,164 8 Careful Career Maneuvering Will Allow Me to Continue Playing Asheron's Call All Day While the Paychecks Never Cease
    2000-10-27 6.51 917 0 Faster, Post-it Note! Kill! Kill!
    2000-10-26 6.38 940 0 I Cannot Be Held Responsible for My Human's Recent Hacker Attack on Your Server
    2000-10-25 6.35 1,198 0 The PS2 Will Have Unbridled Masturbatory Capabilities
    2000-10-24 8.05 1,583 1 The Exploding Toilet Was the Best Part of Lethal Weapon 3
    2000-10-23 6.24 1,053 0 Mario Is Teaching My Son to Flash the Wrong Gang Symbols
    2000-10-21 8.86 2,300 4 This Week's Winner: the Discovery of an Enemy Flag Base Has Destroyed the Shallow Cocoon That Was Once My Life
    2000-10-20 6.52 956 1 The Marketing of New Catch Phrases Is a Serious, Difficult Business
    2000-10-19 4.93 979 0 Why Do We Eat This So-called "Hot Sauce?"
    2000-10-18 7.91 2,216 4 Why, Yes. My New Job Title Is Just an Excuse to Play Asheron's Call All Day.
    2000-10-17 7.6 1,654 1 I Couldn't Stop Eating Meat
    2000-10-16 7.58 1,665 2 Those Things Said about My Mom on the Tribes Server Last Night Weren't True
    2000-10-14 8.2 1,543 7 This Week's Winner: Overclocked Appliance Guy
    2000-10-13 7.61 1,336 1 It's Not That I Don't like Pookie. I'm Simply Suggesting That We Find a Web Site Mascot That Is Less Likely to Pee on My Head.
    2000-10-12 6.59 1,759 2 Do Not Interrupt Me When I Lick the Lucky Kitty
    2000-10-11 5.29 1,817 0 I Didn't Mean to Read the Star Wars Spoiler Page
    2000-10-10 8.09 3,295 5 I've Been Defending This Flag since You Were in Your Father's Scrotum
    2000-10-09 4.55 1,671 0 Your Entire Computer Network Is at the Mercy of My Razor Sharp Beaver Teeth
    2000-10-06 6.6 2,304 1 There's Not Enough Force Feedback in My Life
    2000-10-05 7.69 2,859 2 Hello? I Spilled Zima into My Boyfriend's Counter-Strike Server
    2000-10-04 5.32 1,131 0 Those Guys in Customs Really Need to Lighten up
    2000-10-03 8.56 3,478 6 I Overclock All of My Appliances
    2000-10-02 6.2 1,575 0 Those Guys Who Ganged up on Me in Starcraft the Other Day Were Probably Lovers
© GameSpy - Dave "Fargo" Kosak, Lemuel "HotSoup" Pew, Mike "Gabriel" Krahulik
Archived by @crzysdrs at GitHub
Theme @2015 - Emerald